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Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 2:54 am
by MamzelleCombeferre
Chapter 1
"A girl calls and asks, does it hurt very much to die? Well, sweetheart, I tell her, yes, but it hurts a lot more to keep living." –Chuck Palahnuik


The morning after the barricades fell was the closest thing Grantaire had ever come to a living Hell. He awoke to darkness, his face curled up in his arms, the musty smell of wooden tables infused with years' worth of spilt wine filling his nose. He jolted up. His head left the table too quickly, and for a moment, small white dots of light floated in front of his eyes. He rested his head in his hands, trying to decide if the lack of light was a curse or a blessing. His head pounded and any small movement made it throb harder. He reached out blindly for a cup and ended up knocking a hopefully empty bottle off the table instead. The resulting crash broke the silence effectively. Silence. Too silent. He listened for the familiar voices of his friends, but found only eerie quiet in response. His thoughts were admittedly fuzzy, but something felt wrong. When he finally looked up his sight was blurred from being long unexposed to the sun, not that he could see anything anyways, but there was gravity to this silence that weighed upon him like a physical force. He should look around, but the idea seemed so wholly unappealing that he just sat there for another half hour willing the blood to rush slower through his veins so that he wouldn't feel it so acutely passing through his head.

It was difficult but he finally pushed himself into a position that resembled standing, although it would appear that the legs of the chair were doing more work to hold him up then his own. When he felt a return of his balance, he took a few experimental steps across the room. A few stumbles and crash later (he had forgotten about the presence of the billiard table) he determined that he wasn't going to fall flat on his face and decided to look around.

The main room was slightly brighter. A few of the torches were still lit, enough to see that most of the tables were gone (taken as fodder for the barricade no doubt) and that something was resting upon one of the two remaining tables. He started to move forward to take a closer look, when the idea hit that there didn't appear to be anyone here; that he, Grantaire, Grand R, a capital drunk was in fact alone. The idea was strange, devastating if you took the time to examine the implications, but not singularly odd if you quickly pushed it to the back of your mind like Grantaire was trying to do now. Doing his best to ignore the increasingly niggling thought, he made his way to the table. Up close one could see that the table was far too small for its cargo, if the legs dangling off the edge were any indication. Any desire to lift the sheet quickly died, yet he lifted it slightly anyways. What he found was much less shocking and more desirable to himself. 15 bottles of unopened wine he counted, taking each out to examine it more closely. They were old, probably relics of the days of Monsieur Hucheloup, although he was thirsty enough that even the Corinthe's infamously horrid wine, an absolute travesty really, sounded like the most appealing thing on this, God's great Earth. He cracked open one marked with the date 1794 (how or why Monsieur Hucheloup had managed to hold onto it this long was beyond him).

"The year of our glorious revolution," he remarked sarcastically to himself. Unable to see a cup in close distance, and unwilling to go look for one, he took a drink right from the bottle in his shaking hands.

It was sweet, definitely from the Corinthe's glory days. He quaffed half the bottle before pausing to look around the room once more. His headache had abated some with the return of alcohol to his system, and he found that his vision had become more accustomed to the lack of light. There was a small cluster of mattresses in the far corner opposite of the winding staircase, and next to the kitchen.

Perhaps there would be someone in there, he thought, pushing himself off the floor where he had sat to look at the bottles. The kitchen was a short walk away, and when he opened the door, it looked more like a butcher's shop than the place where the famous carpe au gras was once prepared. He couldn't see all the way in as the kitchen was narrow and long, but could see in one corner a pile of red stained cloth, and next to it a small portable bone saw crusted with blood. The makeshift hospital then. He took a further step into the room and leapt back, smothering a sharp gasp with his hand. There were people on the cots, but they all were dead. He started to back out of the room, nearly falling over something. Not daring to look down to see the object of his stumble, he scrambled back into the main bar room.

Once out, he slid down the wall to sit on the floor, still clutching the bottle. He nearly emptied it now, and it calmed his racing heart enough for his breathing to level. He pushed himself off the floor and all but ran to the front entrance, throwing it open. What he saw stopped him in his tracks.

All was carnage. In his astonishment, Grantaire had taken a sharp breath and nearly choked on the smell alone. How many hours had these bodies been laying here, baking in the smothering July heat to smell so bad? The smell of festering wounds, rotting meat, and excrement pervaded all, their scents amplified by the heat. A wave of nausea crashed through him rendering him speechless, an uncommon state for Grantaire. His mouth gaped like a fish. A look down made him nearly vomit. Under foot was a puddle of blood, partially dried, but wet enough in spots to still soak into his boots. Grantaire found himself unable to move or breath or do much of anything but stand there like a pole. How long had he been asleep? What time was it? Had a few hours turned into a few days? The idea unnerved him. Suddenly his world had turned upside down, and he was afraid to take that first step.

But take that first step he did. The barricade had grown taller since he had fallen into the dark. He saw an omnibus they had tipped among the rubble. All around there were stacks of bodies thrown aside like so much garbage. Yes, the barricades were still standing, but had left in its wake dozens of slaughtered men. Good young men, he shuddered. Better men than I. Desmoulins was right. The revolution does devour its own, and Paris was a starving gamine.
He stopped to get his bearing. All around him was so much death, so many dead. Not ten feet away lay a young man, no more than 17 years, speared through the gut by a bayonet, the piece of metal still sticking out grotesquely. This time he did vomit. He heaved and his bile mixed with the blood. Red, black, sticky, disgusting, these were the colors and feelings of war. He straightened back up; wiped his mouth with the back of his sleeve. Dizzy. The sun was too bright. His body shook as if he was in the throes of a fever.

He hadn't found a familiar face among the rubble. He was almost glad. A manic smile tugged at his lips. He could feel a hysterical laugh bubble up from his very core. They could have escaped. The first few chuckles escaped before he frowned and became silent once again. Whatever fate that would await them if they survived would be ten time of that if they had perished. They were better off dead. It was even possible their bodies had already been taken. The National Guard had been through the battlefield once already. They left their mark, an ammunition bag there, a hat here, and the fresh footprints from their uniform boots everywhere else.

Furiously Grantaire began to sort through the nearest pile of bodies, continuing to both hope for and dread the appearance of his friends. There were both bodies of National Guardsmen and revolutionaries in every pile. They must have stopped trying to distinguish between the two. It was hard, messy work and Grantaire would smell like for days. Everything stuck together, piles seemed endless, and rapid decomposition of the bodies threatened to make him vomit again.
When he found the first of his friends he recoiled dramatically, tripping over a discarded body, landing on his rear end. The impact jarred his spine and for several moments he just lay there groaning. Tears formed at the corners of his eyes. After the pain abated a bit, he pushed himself up, though the small of his back still throbbed. He faced the body again. It was Courfeyrac, but different. His usually cheerful countenance was frozen mid-shout and his rosy coloring was grey and lifeless. There was a single shot in the abdomen where he had no doubt bled to death, it not being a fatal location. The man who, in life, could not stand to see a single suffering face, had died suffering to the very end.

And now Grantaire was not just tired, but bone deep exhausted from the effort in a way that made his limbs feel like lead, and that his head might just explode. He did his best to cover the hole with a shred of cloth so his friend appeared unaffected. It was a meager effort, and there was nothing he could do about the blood stains except try not to think too hard about how outraged Courfeyrac would be about the angry splash of red across his new cravat. Would they put a de on his tombstone? Grantaire wrenched himself away from the thought. If not now he would never leave. The barricade seemed to loom over the scene, somehow mocking them while Paris mourned the loss of her children, defenders, and friends. He tossed the nearly empty wine bottle (he had almost forgotten its existence as a near natural extension of his arm) at that effigy to loss now. The shards disappeared into the rubble instantly.

"Aargh!" He screamed. It echoed off the walls of the houses lining the empty street.

A soldier called out. "Captain I hear someone on the other side of the barricade!" The clattering sound of running feet reached Grantaire's ears. He cursed, taking a spill on a bloody puddle as he tried to run. His knee slammed against what was left of the cobblestones, and he knew that it would bruise tomorrow, but he really must keep running if he didn't want worse injuries. So he ran and ran, pausing only at one street corner to clutch at the stitch in his side and catch his fleeting breath. With great heaves he sucked in as much air as possible and continued his flight. The streets were zooming past at a dizzying rate. All a blur and his head was beginning to swim, although the lack of oxygen could be responsible for that. A few times he could feel the shadows coming in around him, his vision would cloud, and he'd nearly pass out.

But something was watching over the drunk that night, for not once did he fall. The night was old or the morning young, but it was still dark. What streetlamps hadn't been broken were already put out for the night. He couldn't see very well, so when his boarding house came into view, he nearly ran into it. Pounding his fist against the door, he found it already locked for the night. When that didn't work, he slid down the door to sit on the cold, stone stairs leading to the entrance and wept. Something deep inside him welled up, spilling over. It filled his chest and he found it hard to breathe. The pressure released itself in the form of a whimper, like that of a wounded dog, but his mouth seemed too small a hole for so much grief to escape. His body shook with the pain of it. He was overcome with emotion.

Thank God there was no one to witness this grown man cry. He sobbed and whimpered and would have made a general spectacle of himself if anyone had been on the streets to see him until the first rays of sunlight appeared over the tops of the buildings. His cries then slowed into shuddering hiccups, each spasm hurting more than the last. He shivered though it wasn't cold. In another hour the hiccups stopped though the shivers remained, and he just sat there staring stone-faced at the view in front of him, hardly moving or breathing. He was so much like a statue that the early morning passerby's gave him ** looks, as though they were expecting him to break and yet not at the same time. He stayed like this till he felt the light tap of the door on his back; the portress trying to unlock it for the day. Shifting slightly to allow her to open it, he gazed up at her when she stepped outside.

She returned his glance with a mixed expression of worry and annoyance and asked rather sardonically whether he intended upon sitting there all day or if he would rather come inside. She wasn't being rude. This was the tone one had to assume with Grantaire if they wanted the conversation to go anywhere. When he didn't respond, she switched tactics. Sweetly now, with tinged with worry, she asked if he had been out here all night.

"Yes, I came in after the door had been shut up for the night." He had mentioned nothing to her of the barricade, and although she had surely heard of it by now, he had never given her any reason to believe he would be on it. Besides, to be honest, he really hadn't had a part in the revolution at all. No, he slept through the whole thing, he thought bitterly. Again he shivered.

She noticed his shaking frame. "Are you ill?" It could not be the outside air that made him shiver thus, as it was already a balmy morning, shaping up to be an unbearably warm day.

"Perhaps," he began to rub his eyes which were red from lack of sleep and salty tears, "Maybe I will wake up tomorrow and find this to all be a nightmare brought on by nothing more serious than a fever. Perhaps…" He muttered, trailing off his thought like lemmings off a cliff.

"You're not well. Come inside and I'll fix you some soup." Indeed he did look more pale than usual, although he never had much color to begin with.

With shaking legs he stood up, brushing off the dust on his pants, leaving sweaty handprints in its place. He wiped his forehead next and then entered the building. It seemed unbearably hot inside to him. He could feel the sweat bead on his brow and even more acutely the eyes of the portress on the back of his head. "You needn't stare at me so." Like a wounded dog you've picked off the street on your way home from the market.

"Should I call a doctor?" She asked, unaffected by his words and brusque tone. Deftly her hands reached for each ingredient needed to make a simple soup. The combined fragrances laced the air, reminding Grantaire how long it had been since he had last eaten something. Another thought occurred to him, which he voiced urgently. "What day is it?"

"June 7th, Monsieur." She directed another odd look at him.

He stared blankly ahead. Nearly two whole days he had slept to wake up finding his entire world changed.

"Eat this." She shoved a steaming bowl into his hands, a little liquid spilling over the side, burning his hand and breaking his train of thought.

He muttered a dark curse, but raised the bowl to his lips anyway, trying to take a sip. The earlier tremor in his hand had returned, so the bowl shook, spilling a few more drops. However, the soup tasted good, of herbs and chicken. He greedily gulped it down, regretting it almost instantly as it hit his empty stomach hard.

"Would you like some coffee too?" Her hands already busying themselves with the preparations.

He shook his head no. His stomach was already turning, and his previous exhaustion had returned. "I think I'm going to sleep." He stood unsteadily, his sluggish brain working extra hard to get him from one room to another, and up the stairs.

"Good. You are feverish and unwell. Sleep long so that you may be able to function tomorrow."
Tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow he would be able to think properly, but now his limbs felt leaded, his eyelids heavy, and his shiver increasing. He wanted nothing more than to sleep and forget briefly all that had happened to him the last few hours. The small lumpy bed appeared so inviting that he could not refuse it a moment longer to undress. His sleep was fitful. The empty faces of his friends swam in front of his closed eyes, the blackness he had woken to appeared in every corner. He heard ghostly screams and gunshot, although he had not witnessed any of it firsthand. He imagined the devil whispering things in his ears. Words that felt like death.

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 2:59 am
by MamzelleCombeferre
Chapter 2

"A man may acquire a taste for wine or brandy, and so lose his love for water, but should we not pity him." ~Henry David Thoreau


He was in a sort of delirium for nearly three days. When he woke, it was only for a few minutes of semi-lucidity, enough to recognize the face of the portress or the presence of the doctor, before sinking once more. Once he cried out so loudly that the portress had gone into hysterics. Other times he was so quiet that they almost feared him to be dying. He could see them talking, but could not catch anything they said.

When he resurfaced it was like breaking the surface of the lake he used to swim in as a child.

"At last you've wakened!" The portress cried, throwing up her hands in relief. She rested her hand on his clammy skin for several moments before reaching a conclusion. "Doctor, his fever has broken!" She ran from the room.

Grantaire could hear several hurried steps outside his flat and the doctor entered. His face broke into a smile when he found his patient awake and alert.

Grantaire saw the whole thing through a sleepy sort of haze. He propped himself up on his elbows. "How many days have I been out?" He asked before anyone else could speak. His head still felt thick from the fever, and his voice reflected that.

The doctor seemed a bit taken aback by Grantaire vehemence, but answered calmly. "Three days young man." He began to survey Grantaire. He laid a hand on the young man's forehead as the portress had done. "She is right. Your fever has broken, although where you could have gone to contract such an illness is beyond me. A nervous ailment perhaps?" The last bit was said to himself.

"I need a drink." Grantaire said gruffly and abruptly.

"Or perhaps a simple cold gone awry. Either way, it has been coming on for some time for the attack to be so severe—"

"I need a drink." Grantaire repeated, louder, this time attempting to get up from the bed. If no one else would get one for him, he would get it himself.

The doctor hurriedly pushed the ailing boy into a horizontal position again. "Don't agitate yourself."
"I need a drink." He said, more desperate this time. His hand trembled harder. He felt anxious and irritable, and then suddenly tired again all at once it seemed.

"Water would perhaps be best—"

"I need—"

"—in order to stay—"

"—a drink."

"—rehydrated, if you are so thirsty."

Grantaire swore violently.

The portress gave an exclamation of offense, and doctor appeared irritated.

"Such language! She cried, the very picture of outrage, although Grantaire knew she had heard much worse before, and used it too. She only wanted to impress the doctor.

The doctor didn't seem to notice. "Do not stress yourself, boy, unless you wish to fall ill once more. You are better, but you are far from completely recovered." The doctor waited a moment to see for certain that his admonition had sunk in completely before continuing, this time directing his words at the portress who had recovered some face and was once again making hideously annoying eyes at the doctor again. "Now that is settled, I would prescribe at least three more days of bed rest before he is allowed up, and that a few powders be administered daily—"

Grantaire swore again, interrupting the doctor once more. He couldn't care less about powders and doctors if it meant he could have a drink. Just one. Something strong, like absinthe or brandy. His hand twitched more violently that time.

The doctor glared daggers at his patient, not caring two whits that Grantaire had just recovered from a serious delirium and was currently trying to burn a hole in his blanket with his own glare. "Young man. If you wish to be up and about anytime soon, then you would do well to listen to me. You may not have a drink, nor will you be getting up from this bed if I have anything to say about it. You have just recovered from a grave delirium of which we do not know the cause. If you agitate yourself any more I shall be forced to give you a sedative of some sort, and having heard all your insane ranting, I can't imagine you want to go under again anytime soon." It was highly unprofessional to snap at a patient—or worse, personally attack—a patient, especially when they appeared to have been greatly distressed. However, the young man had been dancing on his last nerve. He was nearly quivering with irritation.

Grantaire stayed silent. The doctor was right; he did not wish to go under again anytime soon. One thing continued to bother him though."What did I rant about?" His tone was entirely different this time, soft and strained.

The portress jumped in. "Just a bunch of names. Most often Joly, Bossuet, and Enjolras. Although how you could possibly know an Enjolras is beyond me, being relations of the monarch." She chuckled a little as if she had actually said something witty. When no one else laughed, she coughed lightly and awkwardly into her sleeve and continued, a slight blush lacing her cheek bones. "You screamed once, something about gunshot, wine, and an old man. You also kept apologizing for a hole and a stain on someone's waistcoat. Utterly beside yourself about it you were." She couldn't refrain from a little smirk there, even if no one else returned it.

"Shut up." Grantaire growled furiously, angered by her flippant use of his friend's names. "Don't speak the names of the dead so lightly."

The room went silent.

"You don't know me. Don't attempt to speak to me as if you do." He rolled over to face the wall, thus ending the conversation with both other occupants of the room.

They stood there for a few moments longer, waiting for Grantaire to speak again. But he didn't and soon they left him be. Once he was sure of their departure, he shifted onto his back to stare at the ceiling. There was crack right above him, so small that it wasn't worrying, but large enough that it was noticeable. Now he wished that it was bigger, more troublesome. He wished that it would begin to crumble and fall and cover him right there, or break open to swallow him whole. His hands were still shaking, and his head had begun to ache in the time since he had emerged--a dull, throbbing pain. Nothing seemed more desirable than a drink. That would make the whole world just a little bit better he reasoned. A small glass of absinthe and the world would begin to disappear a bit, always a change for the better.

A small beam of light broke through one of the tatters in the cloth covering his window that he jokingly referred to as a curtain, shining directly in his face, annoying him incessantly. It felt wrong, somehow at odds with how he felt. Darkness had encroached upon his heart, squeezing his chest like a vice. For Grantaire was truly alone as he had never really been before.

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 5:51 am
by Saint Jolras
It's not bad, but Grantaire/OC fics make me sick and a little sad.

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 5:53 am
by MamzelleCombeferre
It's not meant to be a Grantaire/OC fic...

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 6:00 am
by Saint Jolras
Normally that tends to be where things are leading when a female is introduced in such a capacity. Aside from that, I'd wonder why you'd opt for his 'rescuer' to be female.

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 6:03 am
by MamzelleCombeferre
It's really not meant to be taken that way at all. His portress is just really overbearing, that's all.

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 6:18 am
by YoungStudentMarius
I just finished reading it. It's...wonderful, Zelle! I like it a lot! It's really powerful. I know virtually nothing about fan fiction, (I don't even know what a /OC fic is :oops: ), so I can't say I'm a great judge or anything, but I think you did a fantastic job. I really love how much detail you used. It makes it a lot more powerful to describe everything, even the things that wouldn't really matter, I think. It's more of a shock. You really have a talent for description, and I like the way you use metaphors, and certain verbs in a more abstract sense. Your writing is quite beautiful, even when you're writing about such horrors, and it has a certain charm even through all the carnage that makes you want to continue on and read more. The dialogue, too, was very interesting and well-suited to the characters, I thought. Also, going for a mostly limited point of view through Grantaire really works, I think, with the added "omnipresent narrator" portions, because you're explaining both the truth of the matter and the lens through which he sees. Thank you for sharing. I quite enjoyed that, not that I know much about fan fiction or writing, but it was very compelling to me. I'm interested to see how it continues. It looks like you put a lot of work into this. Thank you.

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 1:17 pm
by geminimimi
Wow. If I were to write something so long my fingers would burst. And the quality; it's amazing. I love your style of writing. You have a gift for meticulous detail, and I commend you for how you let the paragraphs nicely flow. I also like your language; they way you use some words to describe some things. For example 'The pressure released itself in the form of a whimper, like that of a wounded dog, but his mouth seemed too small a hole for so much grief to escape' just appeals to me. Characterization is fine so far. Grantaire is his usual self, and your OC does not show overt Mary-Sue qualities, which really rile me. The plot is on a great track too, and it would be interesting to see how everything develops.

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Sun Sep 23, 2012 7:38 pm
by MamzelleCombeferre
Wow! Thank you both for so many kind words! :oops:

Normally what I write is not nearly so long as this, but for some reason the words just kept coming on this one. Originally this was all one chapter, but then another friend suggested I split it up, and she was right.

I'm really glad that you both love the description in this. My background is mostly poetry, and sometimes I feel that it's ruined my ability to write descriptive prose. It makes me very happy to know you disagree. I'm really glad that the characterization seems fine so far. Unfortunately, as pretty much every character Grantaire interacts with in the novel are dead, this story is going to have a lot of OC's, more so than is common, but I do plan on having Marius, Cosette, and Valjean showing up at certain parts, as well as the Thenardiers. I promise the portress serves no purpose beyond being Grantaire's overbearing portress. I cannot write romance to save my life (it comes out syrupy and not at all cute or fluffy), so there will be none of that beyond Marius and Cosette's wedding.

The POV is mostly a default setting for me. I tend to get too mired in the characters thoughts when I write first person, so third person allows me to get out of their heads and into the atmosphere, but the omnicient part of it allows me to delve into thoughts whenever I need to.

I've never had my writing described as beautiful before...Thank you so much. <3 It means a lot to know that you both like this. I always get really nervous before posting anything like this, especially in this fandom where everyone is so well versed in the canon and the history. Thank you both for reading it over and giving me your thoughts. I'll probably post this on eventually as well when I have more of the story written out and figured out.

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Tue Nov 06, 2012 9:58 pm
by MamzelleCombeferre
If anyone is curious or even cares, I've got the first chapter of this up on my deviantart page now too.

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2012 12:10 am
by Gervais
I don't think I've read the second chapter before...nope. It's as awesome as the first. :D
It is beautiful; one thing I've noticed is that people who write poetry have better descriptions and are just smoother than than ones by writers who write mostly stories (no offense to story writers, but it's true), and this isn't an exception to that.

Although I will admit that I'm a little curious about how much the docter and portress know about the revolts...

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2012 7:12 pm
by MamzelleCombeferre
I haven't posted it on because I wanted to wait till I finished the third chapter, but I'm quite delighted that you enjoyed it. :D

I will say that poetry definitely helped me get a sense for flow and rhythem in all types of writing, but it was very hard for me to get the descriptive part back up to par again after spending so much time writing poetry for so long. Again, I'm quite glad you liked this.

As for the portress and the doctor, they do know some, but it's scarely been five days at this point since this the barricades fell, so information is still leaking out slowly. They know of the events, they know what they were fighting for, and such, but specific names aren't really common knowledge yet which is why they didn't instantly connect the names with the barricades. As for Grantaire, he didn't really mention anything about the barricades, and never really talked to the portress about anything related to the amis or anything at all really, so she has no reason to believe that he was on the barricades, and no one would have seen him at the barricades since he was on the upper level of the Musain for most of it. Naturally they both have their suspicions (especially since he does say something about gunshot in the midst of his delirium), but everything he says for the most part is purposefully vague so that they can't pin him there right off the bat.

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2012 7:29 pm
by Gervais
Oh, okay. Thanks for clearing that up :) I was assuming something like that, but why leave it at an assumption when you can ask the author? Yet another reason I love the Internet :D

Re: Unititled Grantaire AU Fic PG-13

Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2012 7:43 pm
by MamzelleCombeferre
No prob. :) The internet is indeed a beautiful thing. :D